Poopy McPoopersons

Like most people, the reality of having kids is far different than the vision I once held of what parenthood would or should look like.

Take my day, for example. (Or any day, really. I’m at the tail end of a months-long Groundhog Day!) It started out like most of our days, kids up, I get up, breakfast, coffee and off our day begins.

Then, I hear silence. Yeah, in our house, that’s never a good sign! I go off to investigate – and wonder of wonders! Hannah is pooping on the toilet!! (At two years old, we are smack dab in the midst of potty training/learning.) We clap and have a flushing celebration! Hooray for poo!

Later we are playing dollhouse, and I smell poo. I ask Hannah if she needs a change – she says no. I check anyway because my nose knows. Hmm. She’s clean. Weird. Maybe Jake? Nope. Clean as a whistle. Then I reach for some dollhouse furniture and the dolls -and I find it. (We have brown multicolored carpet that camouflages well.) Blegh.

So as I’m cleaning that up, I hear, “Mom! I need help!” from Jake. We are working on the wiping…but occasionally assistance is needed. Off I go to to wipe butt #2. (Pun intended.)

Back down I go to see that Hannah has now removed her second Pull-Up (with MORE poo! Seriously? How can that much poo be stored up in that little body of hers?!) Butt #3 gets cleaned. And hands. (Ew. I know. Gross.) And dollhouse. And carpet.

And it happened again. Are you kidding me? Really? Both kids pooped 3 times. Each. And on two different toilets, the floor, and the dollhouse. Not so ironically, she missed the dollhouse toilet, too. (Yes, what dollhouse would be complete without a toilet? Ours has a little cleaning brush attached. How cute!)

Sigh.

Lesson of the day: Poo Happens. A lot. Some days, in many locations.

I simply can’t imagine a more glamorous, picturesque day of mothering! Yay reality!